Tuesday, 9th February 2016
Safer Internet Day happens on 9th February this year. Although this day is primarily targeted towards children and young people, it can also be used to reflect upon online safety overall for everybody.
From shopping online using a credit or debit card, to meeting people that you've spoken to through social dating apps and websites, the Internet can pose lots of risks than first assumed. In the ideal work, there wouldn't be people out there to exploit you or to steal your identity or personal details. However, these people are real and do exist, and with the Internet being accessible from the palm of your hand on smartphones, right into your own home on computers, laptops and tablets, it can leave people feeling exposed, even if they don't know it.
However, we don't want to completely scare you away from using the Internet, as it has many great benefits for people, including reducing social isolation and having a shed load of information, whenever and wherever you need it, just to name a few reasons. And as more people start to head online in search of friendships, relationships and a bit of nookie, it's important to know how to keep yourself safe in the process. So we thought we'd give you some of the basics right here:
What's the rush? Get to know them first.
Okay, so this one all depends on the situaton. But by general rule, at least engage in some sort of conversation and don't be afraid to ask detailed questions. If they genuinely want to meet you then they would be more than happy answering questions. If they are reluctant, or you see any inconsistencies, or just generally get a bad feeling, trust your instincts and stop talking to them. This goes for if you've been talking to them for 5 minutes or 5 months.
Do they need to know absolutely everything, PIN numbers and all?
Would you disclose personal information about you to every single person you walk past in the street? Nah, didn't think so. So why would you do the same with people you talk to online? When the time does come where you feel that you want to share some information, like your address, phone number of place of work, for example, always be weary of what someone could do with that information. This also goes for your social media, like Facebook and Twitter. Be wary if you do except friend requests from people, what content might they see or find out from your profiles?
You got a pic?
No photo, no meet up. It's always better if they can send you a selection of pictures of themselves (not just selfies!) and getting details of the photos, including how recent they are and where they were taken. This also works the other way around also. You can't expect one thing without doing it yourself. Also remember what kind of pictures you are sending. So the urge to send naked pictures of yourself in order to get a hook up may be a priority to you, but rememeber that once a photo has been sent, you cannot "un-send" them and you will have no control over what happens with that photo, so keep this in mind before sending your next nuddy shot.
It's all in the details.
You can tell a lot about a person by the way they communicate with you, but also with what they tell you. If something makes you feel uncomfortable or you have a bad feeling, tell them and talk to them about it. Sometimes it could be a misunderstanding, but it could be more.
Where shall we meet?
It's always advised to meet in a relaxed, public place with as many people around you as possible, like a busy restaurant, cafe or public space, and let someone know where you're going and who with. Where this may not be possible (I couldn't possibly make any suggestions!), there are a couple of additional things you will need to keep in mind. If you are going to meet someone at their home for a liasion, check if they lock the door. If they do, check where they have put the keys. Also, keep your wits about you and plan and map an exit strategy, if you require it. This includes getting away from the person, or people, and getting out of the place where you are. There are also other places where you can meet to hook up in a more protected and safer environment, such as saunas, where you have staff on hand if you need any assistance dealing with awkward people.
If something goes wrong, talk to Trade.
Sometimes, things don't always go according to plan. If this happens, come and talk to us here at Trade where we can support you and provide you with guidance as to what you can do next. You may feel embarassed or nervous to approach us to talk about what may have happened, but the Trade team will not be judgemental and will support you as best as they can.
I want to find out more about keeping safe.
If you want to find out more, get in contact with the Trade team where they can talk you through what to do to best keep yourself safe. Alternatively, visit some of these websites that we've handpicked out for you to read:
- General dos and don'ts of online dating
http://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/2013/06/20/online-dating-tips-dos-and-donts_n_3472326.html
- Safety tips for women, courtest of PinkSofa.com
http://www.pinksofa.com/Safety.asp
- Safety tips for men, including hook-ups
http://gaylife.about.com/od/dating/a/Safe-Online-Dating.htm
https://help.grindr.com/hc/en-us/articles/200302014-Safety-Tips
https://www.gmfa.org.uk/fs149-9-ways-to-stay-safe-on-grindr
