Friday, 17th October 2014
I recently started a Masters course at the University of Leicester, and I was determined to join a few societies. I had attempted to do this when I was an undergrad in Manchester and failed miserably, but this time round I told myself that I was going to be a part of something.
To be honest, very little caught my eye at the Fresher’s Fair (please note: I’m not throwing shade here, I generally have the attention span of a bubble) – except of course for the LGBTQ Association. As I wrote down my email address and made a note of the first meeting, I thought to myself:
‘It’ll be nice to make some friends outside of my course. I just hope it won’t be used as a dating service’.
Now that I’ve spent some time around the members of the society, and been on a cracking social with them, I realise this couldn’t be further from the truth, but what I also realise is this: my initial thought tells me that there are some deep-seated prejudices in the dustier corners of my brain. So I took a dustbuster to the root of that problem.
I’m proud of who I am, and I’m proud to be a part of the LGBTQ+ community – but when I think back to my childhood, there were pitifully few high-profile homosexual couples that featured prominently in the media. My future relationship goals were influenced by over-dramatized soap tragedies and, of course, Messrs. Elton John and David Furnish.
Everyone experiences love in a different way, and that’s a wonderful thing; but I grew up convinced that the only route open to me was a series of emotionally unhealthy flings until I hit 60, at which point I’d don some fashionably questionable sunglasses, a sequined suit and bag my Mr. Darcy. Incidentally, I bagged him much earlier and we’ve been together for the past 3 years.
What I’ve learned is this: it’s important for LGBTQ+ people to understand that the full range of messy, hilarious, romantic and downright dirty relationships are available to them – and that no route is necessarily the wrong one. Also, it’s essential for us to realise that whilst we call out others on their prejudice, we should be rummaging around for the ones tucked into the nooks and crannies of our own minds; and working hard to hoover them up one by one.
TTFN
P.s. I am relatively new to this blogging malarkey, and brand new to the Trade blog, so please feel free to drop me any comments, questions or feedback to info@tradesexualhealth.com!
Written by Nigel
